留学美国申请MBA是很多学生的首选，对于美国MBA的申请，个人陈述起到了很大的作用，本文是加州大学洛杉矶分校(UCLA)MBA申请个人陈述范文，附中文翻译及点评。留学e网为DIY留学的学生们整理了留学文书写作指导及范文模板，包括了个人陈述PS，简历CV，推荐信RL，Essay等各类文书各个专业模板供学生们下载，下载地址：
By serving as a noncommissioned officer in theUnited StatesMarine Corps, I learned and developed valuable leadership skills that would prove crucial to my success as a leader and to my ability to gain the respect of my subordinates. The Marine Corps places great emphasis on leadership characteristics, believing that great leaders are not born, they are properly trained. I submitted to grueling training on my way to becoming an officer in the Marines, and believe this training gives me the foundation of strong leadership skills that I will need in every day corporateAmerica.
Leadership in the Marine Corps is more complicated than the simple management of employees. I learned this lesson the hard way, being thrust into a management position as my unit was being shipped over seas during the Persian Gulf War. As a newly promoted Corporal, I was given the job of night crew supervisor in charge of 15 other marines. In the Marine Corps, leaders are not only held accountable for the work getting done but also for the performance and conduct of their marines. At the age of 21,I had the responsibility not only to carry out my orders but also to safeguard the personal lives and protect the general welfare of my men. This being my second time over seas, I understood many of the difficulties that a young marine can have on their first extended trip away from their family. I enjoyed helping my marines over come their problems, and learned that the benefits were well worth the time that I invested. I discovered that employees who have the support of their management tend to be more focused on the tasks at hand, gaining levels of trust and loyalty that can only benefit the organization.
Related to this issue of gaining trust and loyalty through management supportiveness is that the Marine Corps requires creative means to motivate subordinates. It can be very difficult at times to be in charge of individuals, yet have no direct control over their salaries or advancement in the organization. The government decides military salaries, and promotions are controlled by boards with the primary means of measurement being time in service. For this reason, I learned to manage through mutual respect. I believe it is much more important to gain the trust and confidence of your employees than to use direct compensation to motivate them.
Throughout my Marine Corps career and beyond I developed many strong leadership skills, but most of all I learned that to be effective as a manager one must remain focused on the human aspect of leadership. By concentrating too much on the goal and not on the people needed to meet it, leaders risk alienating their employees and thus failure in achieving the goal itself. By leveraging the lessons and qualities I gained while serving as an officer in the Marine Corps, I hope to meaningfully contribute to the academic environment at the Anderson School of Business.
点评：
本文是一篇表现了leadership skills的优秀文书，可以显示出作者是一个具有管理能力和技巧的MBA候选人。
1、文章结构
文章只有四段不到500字的篇幅，可以分成总分总三个部分。第一部分总起说自己在海军培养到了领导能力。第二部分就具体说自己得到的是什么样的领导能力。第三部分再次强调自己的领导能力，表达要进入安德森商学院学习的决心。
2、文章内容
文章一开头就描述自己在海军得到了宝贵的领导技巧。吸引读者往下看究竟是何种技巧那么重要。在文章的第二部分，作者通过描述作为一名海军军官所肩负的责任，以及他怎么处理上司与下属的管理关系的技巧，得出相互尊重，人性化是管理的诀窍。
3、总体评价
MBA文书向来要求简洁凝练，观点集中，这篇文书首先就满足了这些要求。领导素质和技巧有很多，但是不可能在一篇文书里全部表现出来，因此就要 选取一个别人不太可能有的素材来展现自己某方面的领导天赋。作者选取的素材是他在海军作为一名军官的经历。在文中作者不是体现自己如何有能力带兵打仗，而 是把这段经历提升到自己注重管理人性化，与下属相互尊重，从而可以达到良好的管理效果。
4、可借鉴因素
文章可借鉴之处就是简洁明了，主题明确，选取的素材并不是常人可以经历到的，还有就是从不平凡的经历当中提炼出一种独特的观点。本文中作者得出的管理之中注重管理之中的人性因素，相互尊重比用奖金激励员工更加具有效果的观点就是比较独特，常人不是很容易想到的观点。
译文：
作为美国海军的一名军官，我学会并且培养了宝贵的领导技巧。因为这种技巧对于我成为一名成功的领导者，得到下属的尊重来说是至关重要的。海军对 于领导特质的培养很重视，他们相信领导者不是天生的，而是经过恰当的训练得到的。我历尽磨练成长为海军的一名军官。我相信这样的训练培养了我的领导能力， 而且这种能力在我以后每天的工作中都是需要的。
在海军作为一名领导者比简单的员工管理复杂得多了。我是经过艰苦的学习培养了自己的领导能力。海湾战争的时候我被委任到海军的领导层。作为一名 新提拔的下士，我的工作就是带领一个15名成员的夜间行动部队。在海军里，领导者不仅仅要负责任务的完成，还要负责士兵的表现。在我21岁的时候，我肩负 的责任不仅仅是执行任务，还有就是要确保下属的生命安全和福利。这已经是我第二次出海了，我明白一个年轻士兵首次离开家乡出海会遇到的许多困难。我很乐意 去帮助下属克服困难而且我也明白我的付出是有价值的。我发现那些支持管理者的员工会更加关注手头的工作，对于公司的信任和忠诚也会得到加强。
与通过支持管理者而产生的信任及忠诚相关的就是海军要求创新方法去激励下属。在一个公司管理员工是非常困难的，因为薪水和提拔都没有统一直接的 控制。而政府决定了部队的薪水，提拔也是由委员会根据服务时间的长短来决定的。因为这个原因，我通过相互尊重来管理。我相信去获取年轻员工的信任和信心远 比通过奖金来激励他们更为重要。
在我海军生涯之中我培养了许多领导技巧，但是最为重要的是我学会了要做一名高效率的经理必须注重领导当中的人性化。假如领导者过于注重目标而忽 视实现目标需要的员工，他们将会与员工渐行渐远并最终达不到目标。我希望在海军中作为一名军官学到的领导技巧和平衡能力可以为安德森商学院的课堂作出应有 的贡献。
以上为大家收集一篇mba个人陈述范文，希望方便大家的申请及文书写作，可以做一参考。每个人的经历都有所不同，美国大学所注重的也正是这种个人独特性，所以范文参考即可，不可照搬抄袭。
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(编辑：Ada)
